Semester Dos & The Break

So I'm back. Back in Dom, on the rock , in the jungle. Here to stay, thank the Lord, for another 4 months. Then it seems it will be another crap shoot. Wow I can't believe I haven't blogged since July. That's a whole month.

I went home for the break, funds provided by my wonderful & loving biological father (of 7, yes 7, I found that out also over the break when I visited my half sister who is now attending my almamater). Stayed over in PR in some hot humid mustay assed hotel called the Coqui Inn. Interesting. And got home. My people where over an hour late coming to get me but that's to be expected. But damn it was nice to be back in "civilization". I'm not trying to talk down on Dominica or the people here but there are certain things that I have grown accustomed to and grown to appreciate in my life that this tiny Island just does not provide. So that Saturday we get there go to my Bro & sis school to pick them up and we eat dinner there. Then we go to my auntie's house because she has a cake for me and pizza and it's like a little welcoem back get together. Just us. And then things get...strange.

Someone there stands up and says, Hey I've been having a problem for a while and I want to talk to you about it. And what's going through my head...maybe he's on drugs, or he spent all his money in the stock market or maybe he got some girl pregnant. These are the normal things you would expect right? Nope it turns out he's been having a problem distinguishing what's real and what is not. So I'm still thinking it's drugs. Long story short...he starts saying a lot of wierd things that don't make any sense such as he thinks he is God & the Devil. It turns out he's had a psychotic break. An actual Psychotic break. We don't find this out until Monday when he has to be Baker acted at the hospital. It was a long hectic few days. And I'm sure worse for him because he was there almost 2 weeks. But that is for another blog another day.

So that was the most of the break. I still couldn't drive so I didn't get to visit with my friends as much as I wanted. I messed up my knee again playing ball. Sis lent me a lot of money, which I have payed her back. But we got into some arguements. And I'm still pretty pissed at her now, but not about that. Hmmm anyway my major consern besides the health issue that I spoke of earlier was getting to come back for second semester. NJ kept telling me I would have to pay the entire 13,336 some odd dollars before I could come down, although before they said I would have to pay atleast half. So I'm email hounding the crap out of my bio Dad and he sends me 7 grand. Of course the transfer doesn't arrive until Tuesday after I get back down here, which was on Monday. So I go into check in on Tuesday, the Bursar pulls up my account and tells me I'll have to pay 25% of what I owe before I can start classes. That's a big drop down from 100%. These people are just assholes. So I pay around $3400 and I'm good to go. I'll just have to make more payments from the rest of the 7thousand and my refund check which I haven't got yet.

A few days ago I got an e-mail from Sallie Mae saying that my graduate plus loan for spring is NOT APPROVED. So it seems just when things where looking up, the sagga continues. Like my Mommy told be over the break, life is a series of storms. You are either just getting out of one or about to go into another one. And it seems my next storm is ready & waiting.

Ah my poor Mom. I know she wanted to break down during this whole thing. But she was strong and stood fast and everything turned out somewhat ok for now.

Since I've been back, oh I got straight A's by the way, 4.0 thank you very much. Nique and I had a break at the end of the semester. He tried to feel my up while I was asleep in his bed so I left and told him I was upset about it. Neway we didn't really talk after that. But when I got back I decided to talk to him again. But I can tell I've been getting on his nerves lately. Partially on purpose, partially just being my crazy old selfe. And I think he's loosing his "interest" in me. This cat had the audacity to tell me he had some chick come visit him over the break and they hooked up. HAHA. but he actually thinks I would get with him. I noticed he is most persistant when he is drunk or online. Never sober while in person. Interesting. He's not serious. Sometimes I wish I were a man so I could do these things and have no conscience about them.

Oh and I saw Mr. E on my flight back I stopped over in MIA for about 6 hours. He was an hour late on pickign me up. We didn't have sex as I told him we wouldn't. I believe he did something with someone on his trip to Jamaica. And I'm pretty sure he's been doing something with someone in MIA. But se la vi. I sent him a harddrive from best buy that he scolded me for but immediatly installed when he picked it up then failed to call me back until the next morning only after I bitched at him for not calling me or texting me back the night before. Which may have cost me my relationship with my sis. It probably hasn't it just depends on whether or not I decide to start talking to her like normal again. Gosh I'm so sick of people all of them. I know humans are not perfect but shoot. Sometimes I would rather just be alone. Which I could be very easily. It just sucks because I know I'm gonna need them someday for something so. I'll have to deal. I'm just tired of trying to be something I'm not. I also feel like people are so shallow. That our relationships are so shallow. Or maybe it's just mine.

I feel like I really don't know who I am anymore. Sometimes I do, but I feel like the old me is no longer me anymore. I am no longer that playful humorous imaginitive kid who could think outside of the box. But I'm still not the mature all knowing woman I want to be. I'm just something in the middle which seems not to satisfactory for anyone including myself. I need to spend more time exploring life rather than wondering what other people think of me all the time. It get's annoying. And I also need to spend more time studying if I want to pull off the good grades I did last semester. So time to say adios to all my fictional readers out there. I will be back another day to satisfy your thirst for more stories from my boring life.